This is going to be a seriously silly post. But hey, Iām still new to this blogging thing and trying to find my voice.
So maybe this is my voice. And maybe nobody reads blogs anymore anyway!
This blog post is about Wednesday.
Yup.
Iām a 33-year-old woman blogging about Wednesday.
But I like Wednesday!
There are plenty of TV buffs out there who say itās not even good TV.
Itās been a long time since I cared about impressing anyone with my taste in TV. And honestly, itās been even longer since I met people who care about that sort of thing and are worth talking to.But I have been thinking about it lately. Why do I like Wednesday?
A Relatable Female Protagonist (Finally)
First, even though sheās a teenager in the show, Wednesday is a rare, relatable female protagonist for someone like me. Granted, itās all a fictional setting, but I love watching someone who doesnāt dress in a trendy way, though she obviously has a sense of style, and who doesnāt try to be cute or lovable. I only wish I could be as brusque and self-assured as Wednesday.
I also love a female protagonist who sticks to her principlesāwhatever those may be!
The Right Dose of Horror
Second, I love the horror and gothic elements of the show just as they are.
No, I absolutely donāt want a grown-up version of horror. The real world is full of horror. I enjoy a dark, spooky show that doesnāt actually remind me too much of the world.
Iāll contrast it with another show: The Magicians. I watched The Magicians last year, and in many ways I really enjoyed it. But I did not enjoy the explicit, graphic murders that featured palpable, lingering fear. I did not enjoy the sexual assault. I did not enjoy the themes of child abuse and child sexual abuse.
Obviously, no one enjoys those things (I hope). But the real-world horror they mirror is overwhelming, and itās everywhere.
Thatās not what I want from my TV. So, now that I know whatās in it, Iāll probably never watch The Magicians again.
In Defense of Innocent Romance (and Bug-Eyed Monsters)
On a lighter subject, Iāve read that Jenna Ortega wanted fewer romantic elements in the second season of Wednesday, and I respect thatābut actually, the rather innocent little romantic love triangle in the first season was fun and part of the appeal.
It added just enough intrigue without devolving into sex scenes or melodrama.
I mean, yes, okay, one of the characters turning out to be a manipulative monster is drama, but given that the monster is a bug-eyed almost-werewolf involved in a dastardly supernatural plan involving a dead pilgrim, itās far enough removed from real life that the show remains escapism.
(Also, not to make it weird, but I gotta say that at some point a regular person crosses the age threshold where watching teenage romance that also involves teenage sex is justā¦really gross.)
I Still Love a Good Mystery
I also liked the investigation and mystery aspect. I mean, I was into Nancy Drew as a kid for a reason. But again, I donāt want the grown-up version of that. I donāt want to watch a show about law enforcement investigating human traffickers or serial killers or drug dealers.
Iām thoroughly entertained by amateur detectives exploring a spooky mansion and reading about a once-prominent family in their small town of Jericho. If only the world were so simple.
Not Too Many Texts, No TikTok: Thank God
Speaking of simple things: I also like shows (like Wednesday and Stranger Things) that donāt rely too much on cell phone and computer use!
A lot of real-life drama these days plays out on social media or through textsā¦ but God, how boring!
Not only is it dull to experience in real life, but itās unbelievably boring to watch a TV show try to capture that experience.
Weāre too far gone as a society to expect that social media or cell phones will go away (barring some extreme catastropheāwhich, letās be honest, doesnāt even feel that unlikely anymore).
And of course, they serve many useful purposes. I definitely donāt want to be stuck in a scary situation without a way to call for help (and most pay phones are gone now).
Still, Iām not enamored with these technologies, and I donāt want to watch stories that revolve around them. Maybe thatās because Iām just old enough to remember not having a cell phone as a kid, and then sharing a Nokia with my sister in middle schoolā¦but only being allowed to use it to call for a ride home!
Why Millennials Might Love Wednesday Most
Actually, now that Iām thinking about it, I remember reading another Jenna Ortega quote the other day. She said that when she first read the script for Wednesday Season 1, she realized that the show was aimed at a younger audience than she expected.
Well, I donāt know the statistics on viewership, but when I read that, I couldnāt help but wonder if that was really true.
The more I think about it, Wednesday holds way more appeal for late ā80ās / early 90ās babies than it does for Gen Z. (And just to give us a little definition here, even though thereās really no authority on this, according to Britannica, Millennial includes the birth years of 1981 through 1996, and Gen Z includes the birth years of 1997 through 2012.)Millennials, or at least some of us, grew up with series like Nancy Drew, The Babysittersā Club, and Harry Potterā¦and I see many familiar elements from those worlds on Wednesday.
The Comfort of Camp, Mystery, and a Little Justice
And, maybe this will start a fight (maybe thatās fine), but Iām not sure stories aimed at Gen Z emphasize justice the way Millennial-era stories did.
And a sense of justice is what drives protagonists like Wednesday.
Or maybe Wednesday really is for a younger audience, and Iām just a grown-up hanging on to stories that feel a little like the ones I loved as a kid. But if thatās the case, Iām fine with it. Iāll take weird, self-assured misfits solving spooky mysteries over gritty realism or hypersexualized teenage dramas any day.
Sometimes, camp and justice and a little bit of fake blood are exactly what you need.
Things have not gone well this year, and I am considering bankruptcy.
Thatās BANKRUPTCY.
How did I end up here?
To keep it short and to ignore all the little compounding factors:
I bought a house in 2023 that needed repairs, so I took on several projects.
I left my full-time job in December of 2024, for reasons that I still think are valid, though of course I have been experiencing plenty of doubt about that.
I have not yet replaced the income from that job.
I had a baby in March of 2025.
When I look at the list of bills which havenāt been paid in months, and which include the mortgage, car payments, car insurance and more, I donāt see a way out.
Iām considering bankruptcy with the thinking that perhaps it would be a way to control the fall.
But bankruptcy is considered a bad word, and the mention of it can be conversation-ending.
Most people donāt know that much about it, however.
There are obviously negative moral connotations to the word, and I think the general view is that a person who files bankruptcy is irresponsible or just trying to make others pay for his or her mistakes.
Man, It’s Expensive to Be Alive
Iām not going to explore the moral correctness of bankruptcy too much in this post, but I do want to talk about some basic living expenses.
Housing costs start at about $1,200.00 where I live, and thatās typically for a studio or one-bedroom apartment.
Car payments / repairs / maintenance: $150.00 / month minimum
Total: $2,706.00 / month and $32,472.00 / year
I donāt think Iāve made more than $60,000.00 in a year yet, and I only hovered around that for the last two or three years before I left my job in December 2024.
Prior to that job, my gross (before taxes and deductions) max was around $42,000.00 in a year, and most years much less.
Nonetheless, assuming a gross yearly income of $60,000.00, my after tax amount was probably about $46,000.00 maximum.
$46,000.00 minus the $32,472.00 listed above leaves approximately $13,528.00, or about $1,127.33 per month.
The Financial Reality
Depending on your circumstances, you might be thinking damn! Thatās plenty to have left over!
Not so fast.
First of all, the costs I listed above are the absolute minimum I have seen. The reality of most of those costs is much higher.
For example, take the $200.00 per month out-of-pocket medical and dental cost. That number is likely higher by at least $50-$100 monthly, if not more. Dental crowns or fillings cost at least a few hundred after insurance, and usually there is a $50 – $100 deductible payable at your first dental cleaning each year.
Iāve never had less than a $2,500.00 out-of-pocket deductible for health insurance, and usually itās higher than that.
Prescriptions typically run me $30.00 out-of-pocket for a 30-day supply of one prescription. I have three regular prescriptions.
Plus $400.00 per month for groceries? Thatās $100.00 per week, folks. I donāt know if youāve noticed, but that actually doesnāt go all that far at the grocery store, especially these days.
That clothing and shoe allotment I included totals $240.00 per year. The only way you could make that work in a professional job is likely by shopping exclusively at Wal-Mart and Goodwill (and good luck with the office mean girls).
The personal care budget of $5.00 per month means only $60.00 per year. Itās usually much higher, especially for women, even for *frugal* women.
And now I have a baby. Her daycare costs $305.00 per week. Her formula costs approximately $30.00 per week. She had a prescription for two months that cost $30.00 each month.
And then there are the consumer debt payments, of which I now have many, including student loan debt.
And, even if you never go on vacations (I canāt remember what a vacation feels like), most people do like to occasionally do something fun.
Eating out at a cheap restaurant is usually $25.00 minimum for two people.
Supplies for grilling out probably run at least $25.00.
How about mini-golf this weekend? $30.00.
Your family or friends want you to drive a few hours to visit? Minimum $30.00 for the gas.
Then there are the miscellaneous yearly fees.
For example, it typically costs a couple hundred to file taxes each year.
Car registration costs a minimum of $120.00 per year.
Glasses cost at least $150.00 after insurance.
My utilities actually run something like $400.00 or more per month.
Maybe you have the bad luck to run into a police officer trying to make his contact quota while you are going a few miles too fast. Thatās usually a minimum of $200.00 (fortunately that has not happened to me in probably 10 years now, knock on wood).
Then, letās get into basic home maintenance.
A furnace tune-up is a couple hundred dollars. The annual inspection, cleaning, and maintenance of a gas fireplace is a few hundred (I think I paid $300.00 the last time I had it done two years ago).
Any plumber or electrician charges at least $100.00 just to diagnose a problem.
My point is that while I commonly castigate myself for ending up in this situation, the truth is this:
During the years of my life when my financial ship was in good shape, I had no life. I was thirty years old with a roommate. I went straight home after work. I turned down most invitations to do anything at all. I didnāt go on dates. I worked second and third jobs.
Have I also made some stupid money moves in my thirty-three years on this earth?
Oh yeah. Plenty.
But look at those numbers above again. Not much room for error.
I can just hear certain people in this country now.
Well, you shouldnāt have had a baby if you couldnāt afford it. (Though sometimes they say you must have a baby because otherwise who will work and pay into Social Security? Or don’t worry, everything will work out if you have a baby?)
You shouldnāt have gotten pets.
No furniture either, unless you are financially sound.
Healthcare is a privilege, not a right.
Hell, you shouldnāt eat if you donāt make enough money to eat! That’s on you!
(But also somehow you must keep spending to keep everybody profiting.)
And even though I do not agree with the kinds of people that say things like the above, I have apparently spent enough time around that mindset to have believed in it, to have parroted it to people at times, and to have been unable to shake the guilt of it all.
But I think Iām ready to finally, finally, say:
Shut.
The.
F-Word.
Up.
Iāve never taken public assistance (I donāt qualify) or used a food pantry (Iām not looking down on anyone who has).
For too many years, I received praise for having a āgood work ethicā.
And that isnāt worth anything in this country.
The only things that get a person off the bottom rungs in this country appear to be nepotism, sociopathic behavior, or luck.
And I was too stupid and/or idealistic to work the nepotism angle while I was still young.
But I digress.
Bankruptcy Basics
Letās get back to the B word.
Iām going to break down some bankruptcy basics below.
(PSA: Bankruptcy is complicated, and I am not a lawyer, so the following is not advice!)
An individual (i.e. not a business) filing bankruptcy would usually consider only two types of bankruptcies (there are others).
Those are Chapter 7 and Chapter 13. According to Debt.org, 98% of bankruptcy filings are either Chapter 7 or Chapter 13.
Chapter 7: Liquidation
Chapter 7 is a liquidation bankruptcy and it does not require a repayment plan.
What does that mean? It means if you own anything of value, get ready to say goodbye.
(Fortunately or unfortunately, most of what the average person owns is not considered valuable).
Essentially, a designated person (the ātrusteeā) sells any eligible property you own to pay off your debts. By eligible, I mean there are certain kinds of property that are protected from being sold and the rules on that can vary by state.
Any remaining eligibledebts after that would be discharged, which means you would not be required to pay them. By eligible, here I mean there are some debts that cannot be discharged (i.e. you will never escape them unless you can pay them). Student loan debt is one of these. Tax debt is another.
According to UScourts.gov, āone of the primary purposes of bankruptcy is to discharge certain debts to give an honest individual debtor a “fresh start.”ā
As you can guess, this means that one aspect of filing for bankruptcy is proving that you are honest and deserving of a fresh start, and therefore you must provide a lot of personal information.
According to that same source, you must provide the following:
Bankruptcy petition
Information (āschedulesā) on assets and liabilities
Information (āschedulesā) on current income and expenses
Statement of financial affairs (I donāt know what this means)
Schedule of executory contracts and unexpired leases (I donāt know what this means)
Tax returns for the most recent tax year as well as the tax returns filed during the case
Side note: I hate the word āscheduleā used in this context. What a pompous, confusing word. Schedule basically just means a list of information.
If you have consumer debts, there are further requirements.
According to Azcourts.gov, consumer debt includes store credit cards, credit cards, medical bills, auto loans, and student loans.
For consumer debts, you must also provide the following (Source: UScourts.gov):
A certificate of credit counseling and a copy of any debt repayment plan developed through credit counseling.
Proof of income earned from a job within the 60 day period prior to filing, if applicable.
Details of monthly net income, and any expected increase in income or expenses.
A record of any interest the debtor has in federal or state qualified education or tuition accounts.
Finally, if you are married, there are some additional things to think about. Your spouse doesnāt have to file for bankruptcy with you, but you still have to provide information on your spouseās income, expenses, assets, and liabilities.
I’m not sure why this is considered a separate list, but UScourts.gov clarifies that as part of the above outlined information, the following must be present:
A list of all creditors and the amount and nature of their claims. So your bank, Capital One, American Express, your student loan servicer, the hospital where you had your baby, etc.
The source, amount, and frequency of the debtorās income.
A list of all of the debtorās property.
A detailed list of the debtorās monthly living expenses, which would include food, clothing, shelter, utilities, taxes, transportation, medicine.
Just Because You’re Broke Doesn’t Mean Bankruptcy is Free
There are filing fees due to the court in order to submit the petition for bankruptcy (and obviously these go beyond any fees paid to a lawyer). Per UScourts.gov, āthe courts must charge a $245 case filing fee, a $75 miscellaneous administrative fee, and a $15 trustee surcharge.ā
I assume, but I donāt know, that these are minimum amounts and courts can charge more. Not sure on that.
The Public Flogging…I Mean Creditor’s Meeting
There will be a meeting that you, the debtor, have to attend along with the trustee, and everyone to whom you owe money.
Apparently at this meeting, your creditors get to ask you all kinds of questions about your financial situation and decisions.
After the meeting, the trustee tells the court whether you deserve the bankruptcy. The actual words are, whether the case is āpresumed to be abuse.ā
The bankruptcy judge is not allowed to attend the meeting.
Who is the Trustee, Anyway?
The court picks a neutral party. This is not somebody in your life, and nor is it a government employee. I assume the court has an approved roster of these people and you just get assigned one.
The trustee is supposed to make sure that you are not committing fraud or otherwise hiding information. As noted above, they attend the creditorās meeting and then report back to the court. The trustee is also responsible for selling any eligible property to pay off your debts.
Chapter 13: The “Wage-Earner’s” Bankruptcy
The name on this one is kind of hilarious/ridiculous. Iām going to guess that āwage-earnersā are filing both Chapter 7 and Chapter 13 bankruptcies. But I suppose what they really mean is āgood wage-earnersā.
Chapter 13 is for people who canāt pay their debts, but make enough money to pay them under an adjusted plan over 3 to 5 years.
Apparently this is the option for people who own a house and hope to keep that house from foreclosure.
Additionally, according to Uscourts.gov, āChapter 13 acts like a consolidation loan under which the individual makes the plan payments to a chapter 13 trustee who then distributes payments to creditors. Individuals will have no direct contact with creditors while under chapter 13 protection.ā
For Chapter 13, you have to provide the same information as noted above for Chapter 7, and you still have to have the meeting with the creditors and the trustee. The difference is (and Iām obviously oversimplifying this), you have to submit a repayment plan that your creditors agree to, and then you have to stick to that plan.
A successful Chapter 13 case can prevent a foreclosure on your home, or it can stop a foreclosure in progress, but if your bank gets its ducks in a row first and sells the house, the bankruptcy case doesnāt change anything.
How Long Does It Take?
The Chapter 7 bankruptcy process typically takes between 3 to 5 months, according to Debt.org.
A Chapter 13 repayment plan may take 3 to 5 (but not more than 5) years.
Bankruptcy Consequences
It seems the consequences could vary wildly, depending on your specific circumstances, and the level of stigma prevalent in your social circles.
However, concrete consequences include the following:
A Chapter 7 bankruptcy stays on your credit report for 10 years.
A Chapter 13 bankruptcy stays on your credit report for 7 years.
According to Debt.org, your credit score could drop by as much as 240 points.
You may not be able to get loans, and if you do, the interest rate is likely to be much higher.
As for me, my credit is already ruined, and I canāt get loans anymore anyways.
I am worried, though, about being able to rent an apartment if I lose my house. A lot of landlords do credit checks, and so do some jobs.
Decisions, Decisions
The process to file for bankruptcy seems tortuous at best, and of course I donāt actually want to do it.
I want to find other solutions.
However, Iām already attempting to develop side hustles.
I’ve spoken with a non-profit credit counselor as well, and while he offered some great consolidation options, I ran into two issues with moving forward.
First, he was unable to work with several of my lenders because they, by policy, donāt work with third parties. Second, and this is the real barrier, I had zero extra cash to begin making payments.
I think Iām running out of time and time is of the essence.
If I wait too long on the bankruptcy decision, we might find ourselves homeless. Still, a Chapter 13 bankruptcy requires a lawyer, which obviously costs money.
But, Iād have to sell the house first to file a Chapter 7 on my own.
This morningās baby book club pick is The Feelings Book by Todd Parr. Iāve seen it in English, Spanish, and a bilingual English/Spanish edition, which is the version I picked up at Barnes & Noble, thanks to a gift card I received when my daughter was born.
There may be other translations out there too, but these are the ones Iāve come across.
Image by Nina Harper
Why We Love It
šÆ Bilingual edition available (English/Spanish)
šÆ Engaging, high-contrast illustrations
šÆ Great for introducing emotional vocabulary
šÆ Especially enjoyable for neurodivergent families
šÆ More dynamic than standard black-and-white baby books
Why I Chose This Book
This pick reflects some additional goals I have for my daughterās at-home bookshelf.
I mentioned in my Sharks Teeth to Tail post that I want a good mix of topics including nature topics, planets, general science topics, good habits, math, arts and music.
Well, in addition to that, I want a variety of Spanish, English, and bilingual books.
(Oh, and did I mention I want all of this and to keep the collection around twenty books or less? I might need to adjust my expectations.)
I also chose The Feelings Book because I want to start introducing emotional intelligence concepts from the beginning.
While Iām not sure it fully qualifies as an “emotional intelligence” book, I was pleasantly surprised. It turned out to be more fun than I expected and felt like a great fit for our neurodivergent family.
Our Experience
Alongside the usual feelings (sad, happy), the book includes playful ones like āsometimes I feel like being in the bath all dayā or āsometimes I feel like being loud.ā I love that.
My daughter is drawn to the high-contrast artwork. She watches each page closely, and reaches out to touch the pages.
At first, the art style wasnāt my favorite, but as I read and connected with the content, I started to appreciate the unique illustrations.
In fact, if youāre looking for a high-contrast book recommended for newborns’ developing eyesight, this is a fantastic alternative to black-and-white baby board books.Itās more engaging for both baby and parent, and I expect it to have better longevity. While thereās probably a limited window for books with black-and-white baby animals, I can see The Feelings Book staying interesting for years to come.
A Closer Look at the Bilingual Edition
My husband, a native Spanish speaker, did catch one error in the translation. Still, Iām really glad this book is available in a bilingual edition.
I believe itāll be helpful for my daughter to see both languages side by side, paired with consistent imagery and meaning, as she develops her language skills.
Final Thoughts: Will It Stay on the Shelf?
This book didnāt immediately capture my heart the way No Matter What did, and itās not factual like Sharks: Teeth to Tail, but it absolutely earns a spot on our favorites shelf. (Though I may have to give my husband a Sharpie to fix the translation error!)The unique art style, bilingual format, and handling of emotions in a kid-friendly (and neurodivergent-friendly) way make The Feelings Book a winner.
I don’t really like to yuck someone elseās yum, especially when it comes to baby books, which are often beloved for reasons beyond critique.
But hey, this is a personal blog full of opinions, so here goes.
This book is NOT a baby book club pick, unfortunately.
A Surprising Disappointment
I recently picked up On the Night You Were Born by Nancy Tillman at a thrift store. It had been on my list for a while with its glowing reviews, an enchanting cover, and a general āmodern classicā vibe. But after reading it once with my daughter, I knew it wasnāt going to be a keeper. I promptly donated it back.
There were a few things that didnāt hit me right. First, I expected a lyrical, flowing story, something quiet and poetic. Instead, it felt oddly choppy and melodramatic. The illustrations were fine, but not as captivating as Iād hoped.
Image from Amazon.com. Yes, I donated the book back so fast I didn’t even snap my own picture.
All Eyes On Me!
What really got to me, though, was the message. The book suggests that the entire world, animals included, basically stopped to celebrate the birth of the baby reader. Itās all-eyes-on-you, main-character energy, and honestly, it felt a little absurd.
Now, I do believe that every birth is precious: human and animal (and plant too, though I guess you canāt really call that birth).
And of course, my daughterās birth was a magical event for my husband and I. I absolutely hope she grows up feeling loved and supported, and confident in her unique worth.
But I also believe weād be failing as parents if we teach her that sheās the only one who matters.
A Missed Message?
Maybe this book is meant more as a familyās āwelcome to the worldā kind of message. If so, it just didnāt hit the right notes for me. It felt overly grand, and not in a way I found healthy.
I only read it to my daughter once and knew Iād find it too grating to repeat. She didnāt seem especially into the illustrations either, though Iām not sure why.
Not Sure About That Cover Art Choice…
Tangent: Iām not trying to deprive her of a story for political reasons, butā¦ really? Weāre putting polar bears, the poster animals for climate change victimization, on the cover, doing a celebration dance for more humans?
I’m not anti-baby. The cover art just seems tone-deaf.
I dream of a world where we can have both: polar bears and every other species and happy, healthy human babies, as many as we want, no restrictions. But weāre not going to get there unless we humans figure out how to coexist better with each other and the natural world.
But as it is, I ended up with a few foolish (and foolishly expensive) items.
One of those was the Nose Frida.
Image by Nina Harper
What Is the Nose Frida, Anyway?
The Nose Frida is designed for you to stick one end in babyās nose, and the other in your mouth, so that you can suck out all the junk making baby miserable.
If you have never heard of this and are thinking, who in their right mind would buy this?? Iām going to explain below, but basically yeah, I agree with you.
Iām not sure what I was thinking.
Why I Bought It
I read the reviews and product information online, and people appeared to love this thing. I also read that it has a little filter so itās not like anything gets back to your mouth.
Maybe I bought it because I was picturing the poor little babyās nose so full that they suffer brain damage or something, and I wanted to be prepared.
(I’m not saying I actually consciously believed the baby would suffer brain damage, but apparently I had the vague sense that it would be dire, because otherwise why would I buy this?)
Yes, I was aware that those little bulb suctions are available, but in my pregnancy imagination it wasnāt going to be enough.
I never bought one of those bulb suction things, but fortunately the hospital sent us home with one.
Putting It to the Test
The Nose Frida got its first test about two weeks ago, when my daughter got sick for the first time after attending a week of daycare.Ā
When I unpacked the box, my initial impression was that the product seemed functionally sturdy and easy to put together and use.
The filter, however, was totally unimpressive. I donāt know what I expected but when I saw the filter, I thought surely plenty of viruses and germ particles get through that.
I tried it anyway, confident that I was being a āgoodā mom.
Well, yes, it worked at clearing some of the gunk out.
But it was revolting, which I should have anticipated.
I definitely feel like stuff got in my mouth, especially because you have to suck pretty hard on the little tube in order to clear a babyās nose more than a manual bulb suction would.Ā
And for the record, I also got sick, and for me it turned into pneumonia.Ā
My Recommendation: Keep It Simple
Iām not blaming the Nose Frida for getting sick, because I understand that an anecdote is not evidence, but Iām also not going to use it again.
The blue bulb boogie sucker works great and I finally looked up how to clean it online, so now I feel even better about using it.
Frida has quality products that are obviously intended to make life easier for parents.Ā For example, I used their postpartum briefs, and instant ice pads, and would definitely recommend both of those.
But this thing is expensive for what it is, and I really donāt recommend it.Ā
